Expectation as Goal and Gauge

I posted a response on our Conscious Creation discussion list which I thought would also be a good post in this blog….

Sue had posted this quote from Abraham (channeled by Esther Hicks): “The emotion you feel is always about the vibrational variance between where you want to be and where you are. If you’re out of balance, there are only two ways to bring yourself into alignment: Either raise your expectation to match your desire—or lower your desire to match your expectation.”

I replied:

Expecting to get what you want seems to be an indication that where you are and where you want to be are the same thing. The emotional experience of expectation feels very confident and knowing.

I think that aligning with the expectation of getting what you want can be an interesting challenge when you’ve been trained AGAINST having what you want (whatever you’ve been told you CAN’T HAVE and grew up struggling to get, or the like). After a while, you internalize the CAN’Ts and just struggle with it inside yourself, then it gets a bit harder to see because it seems like (and is) just a part of who you are at the moment. Soon, all you start to feel is negativity when you think about what you want, or stop knowing what you want altogether, instead of the good feelings or the desire/attraction itself – that does seem like one recipe for depression!

For myself, there’s been a loose process around dealing with this:

  • stop identifying with the negative emotion, in the moment, so you can really SEE it clearly for what it is and not just how things are.
  • catch the triggers that make you automatically react in that negative emotional way. Being around certain people, offhand remarks, environments, anything.
  • choose NOT to feel the negative emotions, even if you don’t know what else to feel at the moment.
  • choose to feel a different way, understanding that feeling the OLD way is NOT actually ‘natural’ even though it seems it is because you’ve been doing it so long.
  • choose to think/believe a different way, often uncovering what IS a ‘natural’ thought for you, buried under the opposite training. learn to trust yourself.
  • continue to catch triggers and use them to ‘massage’ yourself into a new perspective. Like catching yourself thinking when you’re supposed to be meditating, and just flipping back to meditation without chastising yourself or getting caught up in the drama of failure.
  • refinement on all of the above levels, repeating steps and process until you’re where you want to be.

I think our ability to align with our true desire, to expect what we want, is completely independent of any circumstances in our lives. In other words, we must choose to feel the expectation no matter what is going on around us, even if it’s the exact opposite, even while we still interact with our currently existing circumstances.  This is just another part of the process I described above. Sometimes we really WANT to be at the level of confident expectation, but we’re not yet, as it hasn’t all come together, and we can get depressed, tired of trying, tired of the ‘apparent’ lack of progress, etc. – these are just more negative emotions that we learn not to hold onto. Just let them go and return to where you want to be – sometimes that can be a struggle too.  (Another way to look at this is as a shift to being the creator of an experience/thing rather than someone who simply reacts to what has already been created.)

And how much can we REALLY expect? How much can changing our expectations really change our world, ourselves? Do we really expect to be able to eat chocolate cake and still lose weight? And what comes up for us when we decide we DO want to lose weight but also eat chocolate cake – beliefs about how our bodies work that are based on intimate self knowledge? Or based on current medical attitudes? Or based on what your mother taught you growing up? Beliefs about there being some things we can or can’t change or shouldn’t try to? And where’s that line between what we can change and what we can’t?  Who drew it there? And do we have the ability to erase that? Why or Why not?

[tags]conscious creation, reality creation, law of attraction, expectation[/tags]