RC101 – Lesson Seven
Self Appreciation and Your Power in the NOW Moment
In the past few lessons we have talked about judgment and self-criticism and how it holds you back from manifesting your dreams. Today’s topic is on self love and self appreciation and how accepting these states of being into your life accelerates the manifestation process.
Think for a moment about some area of your life in which you can really appreciate yourself. Let the feelings of warmth and joy flow through you. As you connect with this vibrational focus in this one area of your life, you will probably begin to associate and connect similar memories from other areas. You have now tapped into the essence of love, the most powerful creative force in the universe.
What is Love?
Fundamentally, YOU are love. Love is more than an emotion, it is a state of being in which you allow a greater flow of creative energy in your life. One way to look at the experience of love is as an alignment of your energy (focus) in physical reality with your Self. Self love is accepting that energy into yourself, recognizing it as a part of yourself and knowing that you have never really been separated from it. As a conscious creator, when you step into this state, magic literally happens. Events and things you have been focusing on may suddenly appear without effort, and old problems may vanish in the same manner. Allowing love into yourself makes it easier to focus on your desires. Your dreams take on a more vibrant perspective as you become more “awake,” and the doubts or limitations that you used to believe in will look almost silly, a paper cage which held back a very real “tiger.”
What Love Is Not
Technically, there is nothing that “Love” is not, however, we’re referring to the EXPERIENCE of that love in our everyday lives. Being in a state of love within physical reality does not mean sitting passively in a blissed out state while the world continues on around you. Love is energy. Love is creative. Love is aggressive. Focusing on love does not mean sacrificing your own happiness for others, always being pleasant, or trying to “get the word out” to others so that we can all know this state. Being in a state of love is knowing that following your own joy can only have a beneficial effect on others – whatever state you experience is what you radiate around you. Being in a state of love is, pointedly, simply being YOU in every moment, no judgments about your expression, just you flowing YOU.
Going back to the self appreciation exercise at the beginning of the lesson, how many of the memories that came up had to do more with you focusing on DOING or GIVING something rather than receiving? There is nothing wrong with giving, or for feeling good about it; however, sometimes we put an entirely different set of standards on receiving. Can you feel the same sort of appreciation for yourself during those times when you received a present, or got a massage, or even just treated yourself to some ice cream that you did when you treated a friend? No matter what an action or event looks like on the outside, there is always an energy exchange occurring, so allowing yourself only to focus on either giving or receiving is only seeing part of the picture.
Judgement and Non-Appreciation
Think about those times in your life which you don’t feel love and appreciation at all. Those “bad” or “dark” times which you probably wish never happened and would much sooner forget. Can you feel the weight of these memories dragging you down? The effects of these memories can be very dramatic, especially when they are in contrast to the experience of feeling self love.
Holding onto the judgments and unforgiving nature of these memories is quite literally a drag upon your energy. These are the chains that Jacob Marley carries with him in the Charles Dickens classic “A Christmas Carol,” learning to love these areas is of course the key to releasing them.
No matter how bad this memory or situation might be, whether you see yourself as a victim or an aggressor, if you are holding on to anger, hatred, self-hatred, bitterness, self-condemnation, self-denial, or anything similar, you are only succeeeding in punishing yourself for something that no longer exists. It might help to remind yourself that you are not the same person who you were then (this is literally true). The person you have become has learned, or is ready now to learn whatever lesson you want to take from these experiences and release them. You can love yourself for doing the best that you knew how to do in that situation. You may have learned to identify yourself with a person that feels this way, but you can also let go of that association in favor of something more joyous. Try to see the situation from a perspective of love, seeing everyone involved as a character in a play. Imagine that all of you went out for a friendly drink afterward, which is probably what happened outside of physical reality. 🙂 Remind yourself that you weren’t just an actor in this play, but the director as well, and try to thank everyone who particpated, and allow yourself to be aware of any feelings that come up as you do this.
Forgiveness is the pivot point where you cease holding something separate from you and choose love. Choosing love is the act of taking within that which we had projected outside of ourselves or denied. It’s one of the most powerful movements we can understand as human beings.
The Power of NOW
In metaphysical terms, there is no past and no future, they are only illusions created around the present. Whatever “time” or “date” it is, it’s always NOW. Those illusions can be very convincing, but the important part to remember is that you are here right now, and you are creating your life, your own most intimate work of art right now. Everything in the now moment you have created, either thorugh deliberate intention and choice, or unconsciously choosing the same thing that you did in the “previous” NOW moment.
Letting Go of the Future
We’ve discussed releasing the past and freeing up the sort of energy attachments we place around it, but what about energy we project into the future? When you are “thinking” about the future, you are more likely off in your head instead of experiencing the present from your center. When you are off in the future, you out of your center of power, which is why future dates and prophecies can be confusing or even alarming. The only time you have to “DO” anything is right now – and what are you focusing on RIGHT NOW?
Many new age circles have been talking about “the shift” as an event that’s going to be happening soon. Some predict 2005, some say 2012, and some say 2075, from a conscious creation standpoint these numbers are basically meaningless, you can live the life you want to experience right NOW, you start by simply saying: “I choose to live my ideal life” and do so.
In our personal lives we often project desired events out into the future as well. “I’ll lose weight after the holidays.” “I’ll be free of this job once I have enough money to retire.” These type of statements make joy very conditional, in essence they are saying: “I must suffer now to enjoy later.” Or in the case of the first one: “I’ll enjoy now, but I must pay the price later.” Anytime you find yourself projecting this need to suffer in relation to something you enjoy, it’s an excellent place to not only release limiting beliefs, but to examine your own sense of self worth and self appreciation. Are you loving yourself during these times? Or are you judging yourself as guilty for feeling joy, and therefore need some form of punishment in order to restore your balance? Are you allowing yourself to have exactly what you want NOW or are you basing what you want on your experience of limitation in the PAST?
When you accept that you really only live in the NOW moment, you learn to release any conditions upon your joy. As a conscious creator you know that eating a piece of chocolate will only make you fat if you believe it will. If you release that belief, then you are free to enjoy that chocolate, and if you are centered in your own state of joy, there is no need to judge yourself guilty for doing anything that gives you pleasure.
As stated earlier, there really is no past or future, only NOW. If you believe in guilt and punishment then you create the circumstances for that punishment at the same moment in which you are doing the guilty action. That punishment might not manifest immediately, and can take any number of forms, but as long as you believe in the duality, the cause and effect conditionality, you will create it.
When you begin to really love yourself, and see everything through a lens of love, you see in terms of unity instead of duality. You can see the connections between seemingly unrelated events, and synchronicities just seem to make sense as the new norm. You can see how duality is a struggle of opposites, forces balance each other by struggling in opposition. Whether you label them “good and evil” or “ego and inner being” or “order and chaos” the result is always the same, you are focusing your energy in opposition to yourself, rather than toward fulfilling your desires. This has the same effect as pressing the gas at the same time you are pressing the brake in your automobile – lots of energy and effort, little or no movement or results. As a simple exercise, push your hands against each other as hard as you can for several seconds. Feel how tiring that is? When you believe in duality and take action within that framework, that is where your energy is going every moment.
How do you stop believing in duality? Choice, and self love. Behind every seeming duality is a uniting truth – open yourself to seeing and understanding that truth. Accept that all of you is worthy of love, that you are a wonderful loving being NO MATTER WHAT YOU “THINK.” Let any resistance come up, and gently remove it. Let love encompass it and flow around it the way a river flows around a stone, slowly eroding it until the current carries it away.
Homework: Write down everything that you appreciate about yourself. Re-read it, and let that sense of love and appreciation really stay with you for at least a few minutes – bask in it. Afterward, pay attention to any kind of resistance that may have come up during the exercise. You may notice this resistance as “negative” emotion. Write down whatever you felt and try to see it from the perspective of love.
This will be the last actual lesson, although we are going to have at least one more question and answer section which will be presented either tomorrow or on Tuesday – so get your questions to us if you have ’em! Both of us have completely enjoyed writing this class and really appreciate all the wonderful feedback we have recieved as well as the great questions. Thanks to everyone who shared this experience with us.
John and Kristen
End Lesson Seven