Channelings Du Jour – December 2000 – January 2001

Printed in the Conscious Creation Journal
December 2000 – January 2001, Issue 15

On Global Warming – a message from BOARST
as channeled through the one and only “Cheeky Delinquent”

Boarst is a group of entities from Atlantis that I channel. Here is an excerpt from session #@#*&%%!!

Cheeky: Good evening Boarst. I have a question concerning global warming. Our scientists are saying that air pollution is causing a green house effect, and the planet is warming up, the polar ice caps are melting, the oceans are rising and we all will be living in desert conditions in a few more years. They are saying the problem is caused mostly by SUV’s spewing hydrocarbons into the atmosphere. What can we do to prevent this?

Boarst: HA Ha Ha! Is that what you believe? You are a fool! Your scientists are fools!  Global warming is very real and the cause is not your pretty little SUV’s. The cause is a depletion of atmospheric pressure around your planet. This lack of pressure is causing major air current shifts towards the industrialized countries, away from the less developed countries. The shift in air currents is causing major weather patterns to be altered, bringing hot dry droughts in portions of your country and wet cold weather in other portions. Your winters are messed up as well. This pattern of degenerating weather will not be stopped because the cause will never be recognized by your government, and if it were, it would never be accepted by your people. The cure would be unthinkable.

Cheeky: Whata maya bea thea causationa ofa sucha globala warmingsa thata youa speaka soa eloquentlya ofa?

Boarst: What the hell’s wrong with you? You’re speaking like an idiot!

Cheeky: Sorry…I don’t know what came over me, it just came out that way all by itself.

Boarst: don’t let it happen again… now then…global warming is caused by a lack of atmospheric pressure. There is a lot less air in your atmosphere today that there was a century ago.

Cheeky: Wherea dida ita goa? Oops! Oh shit!

Boarst: Firestone. You may blame it on Firestone.

Cheeky: The tire manufacturer?

Boarst: Yes! Your atmosphere is being compressed and stuffed into tires! There are currently over 12 billion inflated tires on your planet, all filled with your atmosphere. To put it in perspective, each automobile tire holds enough compressed air to fill an average sized room. Each car has 4 tires and on spare, enough air to fill an averaged sized home. Your pickup trucks have twice that much air in their tires with their higher PSI ratings. Your 18 wheelers carry 2 spares, each tire holds enough highly compressed air to fill an average sized two car garage. One pickup truck equals 2 houses, one 18 wheeler + 20 garages. Add it up and you get the picture. Your atmosphere is collapsing as it is being stuffed into your tires. The countries with the most tires being filled at any given time is sucking the air out of the rest of the world, causing major low pressure systems, the likes of which have never been recorded before. As you are well aware, low pressure systems cause unstable weather. Your atmosphere has collapsed 5-1/2 miles in the last century, causing a rupture in the ozone layer. In the next ten years your people will store compressed air in another 14 billion tires, allowing your atmosphere to drop another 7.3 miles. Your weather will worsen until your scientists figure it out. Meanwhile you have also compressed your atmosphere into other things as well. Footballs, basketballs, tennis balls beach balls. You must let the air out of your balls. Then there are carbonated beverages, cans of spray paint, and giant gas bubbles in the colons of beer drinkers.

Cheeky: Holya shita!

Note: Firestone has NOT actually been connected to the idea of global warming – this is what we call SATIRE, people!