All the Time in the World by ChiaraDina Cerweny

Printed in the Conscious Creation Journal
December 2000 – January 2001, Issue 15

All the Time in the World
by ChiaraDina Cerweny

“I am amazed by the variety of existence, the one I know, not speaking of those I do know only subconsciously but haven´t experienced consciously, realized, so to say.” ChiaraDina lay loosely on top of a brick wall, enjoying the sun warming her imaginative body in the realm of ONE and C. “Somehow it´s just so hard to keep the balance between myself, the woman, and then the my Self – the all. The more astonishment there is, the more confusion can be there as well.”

“Well, ChiaraDina,” C said, “our worlds are coming closer together, we are merging with you in your consciousness and awareness, we never have been separated, but as the veils are generally lifted, you become more and more conscious about it. Sometimes it amuses you and you dive into the pool of love and sometimes you feel nerved by its variety of expression and possibilities of interpreting the truth and finding your way through it. And we know about your ‘what does it all mean’ problem, by the way.”

“I knew I couldn´t keep it from you.” ChiaraDina smiled, while C lifted her eyebrows knowingly. “But it is an underlying paradox that I haven´t solved for myself in a satisfying way. The big WHY question, my hunger for more – if I am everywhere and utterly perfect, spread through all times and all dimensions, no movement towards something, as all exists apart from any movement that could be, movement towards something is an illusion itself…. Why has this place been created, why are we born with the internal urge to strive for things, for realizations? What is the purpose of a charade that supports our haze that we haven´t already … I don´t get it. I can´t feel it now. Is it love ?”

“Well, there are those moments where I just feel love and amazement, astonishment by being present and aware of who I am and observe, involved. But haven´t we been told that nothing lasts forever, all life is change and nothing can be held onto forever? So this feeling of universal love vanishes as well, like waves hitting the shore, coming, going, coming, going. Why are we born with the need to feel a reason for all of this, some of us concluding that there simply is none to have their peace of mind, some accepting explanations that somebody else have prepared for them and diving into a model of reality creation, and why goddamit ..” ( ChiaraDina took a deep breath ) “…can´t I be satisfied with what others tell me. I would have so much more time to .. well, I dunno.”

ChiaraDina laughed realising her own self-made paradox. “Well, honestly, I don´t know. Actually I love that I am on an exploration. But as it is with everything, sometimes I am just tired and I want more answers NOW. I am tired of raising vibrations or anything else, training or concentrating, I want it NOW effortlessly, because I am spirit and think and that´s the reason for why it can be instantly.”

ONE was trying to say something, but ChiaraDina interrupted her. “One, I know what is coming now: All in time, you wanted to say, right? Enjoy the ride, there is none, you are here to be eternally in a timeless now state and seize your mind to create in this dimension with the support of a body.”

“Actually,” ONE laughed, “I wanted to say something entirely different. We are sometimes “impatient” as well, as you would call it. Eager to strive for what we do not know, eager to strive for dreams and experiences to become memories. But we also stick around here to observe and learn by teaching the simple things we thought were much more complicated. So do you, and you stick with a certain frame of mind that keeps you charged with certain emotions that support your thinking model of a journey, or the one of regaining power, or the one of reminiscence. Observe why you have chosen these mental models. I bet it has something to do with emotions you still need to experience to feel fulfilled. To create emotional change and tension, or the appearance of it. And by the way, you can stop worrying about that we haven´t heard your call, we hear you pretty well. You´re ready, that´s wonderful with us. Trust that the road is open, sorry to report that your spirit is changing into a frequency where a lot of things will not appear any longer to be separate jigsaw pieces for you. I know – a common term, you go and change. Who you are simply still blows you away and you need to learn lovingly and gently about who you are and what you are capable of doing.”

“Look into the net, your conscious-web. Find all the creativity concentrated – all its – your – variety and see your mental background and motives behind it. Evolving is nothing more than transforming the unknown into the known, seeing the lies and bla bla´s and holding onto the core and the essential. Try to hold on to this for now. See the variety of your life and how multidimensional it already has become. You are aware of us, NOT incarnated, still a part of you. You are aware of so many reflections of your self, what matters – as I always love to say – you even sometimes wonder about soul extensions and energetic connections between people that share similarities in their facial features. You admire mathematicians for their precision and logic, you love musicians for their emotional ability to communicate interdimensionally through the voice of frequencies.”

“See your abundance by what you have come to see, think about and reflect upon, but even more, see your unlimited abundance by the questions that you HAVEN’T posed yet, things that HAVEN’T been answered yet, because they shape your experiences and at the same time the depth of them. Your desireful “Why” is your key to unlimited abundance of life – and this is still the key for us as well.”

ChiaraDina nodded, more quiet again. “Aren´t you sometimes bored when I am just so unsatisfied? Yes, I admit, I want more. I want to see it all come to realization and I guess what I still have to learn is that I am light enough, I am enough, and I am not under pressure when it comes to time and my physical body. I can hardly trust that, “aging” is just such a common “you have to know that´s the way it is.” But I do my best to hold on to this “essential” knowledge of freedom, the song of freedom I have in my heart; my composition of reality. And I ask you to support me. While I am aware of the other choices, I can trust in my power to pursue mine, no matter how exotic it is. I am part of creation of infinite choice, and my choice is an important piece of balancing the whole.”

ChiaraDina smiled. “And I guess you folks want me to keep this as my mantra until we meet next time, right?” ONE and C exchanged a knowing look. ChiaraDina leaned back and placed her head onto the shoulders of C. “I trust you – you carry me now,” she whispered before she faded away from them.

(c)2000, ChiaraDina Cerweny, including graphics.   Published in the October-November 2000 issue of the online Conscious Creation Journal.   Feel free to copy this article for personal use – please include this copyright notice.