Printed in the Conscious Creation Journal
April-May 2000, Issue 11
Magic & Manifestations
The Missing Stapler
This morning at work, I noticed my stapler was missing. Have you ever had the experience of misplacing/losing a simple, taken-for-granted piece of basic equipment like that? You never notice how often during the day you need the damn thing till it’s not there!
My day seemed to be marked by periodic moments of frustration as I would have to go find a convenient stapler to use. I finally mentioned to my boss that I was going to have to go and buy a new one. We both joked that, of course, the minute I came back with a new stapler, my missing old one would be sitting there in plain sight. This is exactly what I said (wording may be important) to him: “As soon as I show up with another stapler, the old one’ll be sitting right there.”
Okay, so… to digress for a moment; there is a fellow in our office named Mike who no one likes. No one likes Mike because he is lazy, incompetent, useless and indescribably irritating. Mike is also bizarrely covetous of office supplies and occasionally absconds with something he wants/likes. I discreetly checked out Mike’s desk several times during the day, but no sign of my stapler (he has his own). Well, late this afternoon I was doing a more thorough search now that Mike had left for the day. No luck. While conducting this search I was finding little tell-tale signs of Mike’s un-productiveness (we’re talking about a guy who spends an hour or more each day making personal phone calls) and feeling grumpy, so I just decided to steal HIS stapler (mean and unjustified, I know, but hey, at least I DO something!).
I walked back to my office, stolen stapler in hand. As I stepped in, my eyes fell on my wastebasket. Earlier that afternoon, I had found a legal pad in my wastebasket which had apparently fallen in accidentally (I know, I know, there ARE no accidents), how I do not know. I suddenly thought “could the stapler be in there too?”
Sure enough, barely even hidden behind some wadded-up tissues and crumpled faxes, was my stapler. What had I said earlier? As soon as I showed up with a new stapler (new to me, anyway), there would be my old one? And I was right!! Didn’t even have to buy a new one to prove it, either!
And, yes, I did put Mike’s stapler back.
– (c)2000, Alan K. Crandall